Author Archives: Netmom

Sweet Sixteen

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Sweet Gamma turns sixteen today… in Berlin.

I’ve thought about her throughout the day, but it just occurred to me a few minutes ago that in almost 20 years of mothering four children, this is the first time that I’ve not had one at home to hug on her birthday.

Sixteen years ago today, I awoke in a puddle.  HWTFM, in one of his classic moments, asked if I’d wet the bed.  I told him I didn’t think so, whereupon he asked if HE’d wet the bed.  Since I was the one in the puddle, I told him I thought we were going to have a birthday party, and no one had wet the bed.  At least not in the sense he was thinking of.

He went on to work, as I suspected at that point we still had hours to spare.  Gamma was the only child born on a day other than Sunday.  After packing the few items I would need for a trip to the hospital, I decided to walk — in the air-conditioned comfort of West Town Mall, being closest to Parkwest, where I was scheduled to deliver.  I called my doctor’s office to let them know that my water had broken, and that I’d be in sometime that day… sometime when I got good and ready, that is.

I took the older two (almost two and almost four years old at that point)  to my mother’s house, and headed to the mall.  At Victoria’s Secret, I bought a new summer-weight robe for my brief stay at Parkwest, met a couple of friends, and walked around until labor pains were stopping me in my tracks every few yards.   I called HWTFM to let him know I was headed to the hospital, hopped in my little car, and zipped on over to the doc’s office.

My regular ob-gyn wasn’t on call that day, so I got his partner.  The girls in the office braced me for the fact that he was upset, having been trying to track me down all day.  Evidently, once the bag of waters has broken, they don’t want you to do anything except go to the hospital and lie there.  (Who, me?)

That should have been an indicator for me to have them call my regular doc, but I won the battle of wills that day.  Without anesthesia.

Not a great deal later, Gamma made her appearance in this world at 6 lb, 11 oz.  My smallest baby.  As was our custom, HWTFM went over to Grady’s and picked up some real supper for me, including their famous chocolate bar cake.  She was beautiful, quiet, snuggly, and perfectly healthy.

It was an excellent day.  And I’m sure that today is an excellent day — surrounded by friends, on what may be the grandest adventure of her life so far.  I miss her terribly, but as you can see from the beach picture she sent last week, she’s happy.

Today, she is also old enough to legally drink beer in Germany.   When she comes home in a few weeks, we’ll hightail it to the driver’s license office to get her ticket to ride.  Funny thing, that we allow sixteen year olds to drive but wait until 21 to drink, and in Germany, they can drink at 16 but can’t drive until 21.  At least there’s still the same 5-year separation of the two, which is probably most important.

Happy Birthday, sweet Gamma!

Out with the Old

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I haven’t written much in the past couple of weeks, as I’ve been tied up as "mechanic’s assistant" in helping HWTFM take the engine out of Beta’s 1991 Explorer.

Gotta take the old one out, before you can put a new one in.

Getting the bolts loose on a vehicle that’s been driven a hard 200k+ miles (it was a farm truck for most of its life) is tough.

When it came to the last four bolts holding the exhaust manifold on, it was worse than tough.  It was a @#$&!.

An impact wrench didn’t work.  Cheater bar didn’t work.  PB Blaster Penetrating Catalyst didn’t work.  Heating the plates with a blowtorch (to expand the plate, but not the bolt) didn’t work.

A humble little Black & Decker drimmel tool cut right through them.  Finally, the engine is out.

What a way to spend Father’s Day, eh?

Seriously, it takes a committed dad to agree to take on a project of this magnitude for any child, but especially one who isn’t even here to help (or watch, or ooh and aah at his efforts) — she’s at the beach.

HWTFM is a seriously committed dad.  It’s one of the many things that I treasure about him.  So… we’re off to visit my dad, partake of some steak, and generally admire what good fellows they are.

Notes from Gamma

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Gamma writes that all of Germany is consumed with Euro Cup fever at the moment:

We have been watching almost every soccer game in anticipation to see who will place where in the European cup! The Americans have SO been Germanized! We argue about how bad the Swiss will OWN the Polish or if the Spanish can conquer the Russians…it’s intense…soccer is god here.

 

She also writes that there are more bicycles and motorcycles than cars, likely due to the "OUTRAGEOUS!" price of gasoline. Heh… we might be headed that way soon. Gamma will celebrate her 16th birthday one week from today — in Germany — but I suspect that the coveted driver’s license might not be good for as much as it was for her sisters.

Might need to trade the Mousemobile for a Vespa or something.

She says the weather has been excellent, and that they’re feeding her well. That’s good, because her first note home had some interesting culinary hints:

1) I like sweinebarten….a lot.
2) Germans are nice, but not if you get in the way of their bike (whether you apologize or not)
3) It is cool to have a couch in your room (i have one!!!!)
4) If the cheese is cream colored…don’t eat it
5) If the cheese looks old…DON’T EAT IT!
6) if the cheese looks yellow-orange with regular edges…it is probably safe to assume you may eat it…
7) if the meat has ”stuff” in it…don’t even THINK about eating it!

"Sweinebarten" is pork roast. I bet there’s a recipe for it in the German cookbook that Anne brought me back in April.

Weekend Warrior

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This weekend’s project was to get serious about rebuilding Beta’s 1991 Ford Explorer.  It’s 17  years old, has more than 200,000 miles on it, but other than the fact that she overheated it and blew the engine, it’s a decent vehicle with a lot of life left in it.

After looking at used vehicles for several weeks, we came to the conclusion that rebuilding this one is a better investment for the money.  So on Friday, we picked up the new engine, and set to work taking the old one apart.  This effort, of course, gave HWTFM good reason to make another trip to Tractor Supply and buy a new toy — a 2-ton engine hoist.  But we’re not to that part yet.

I got plenty dirty in this project, but that’s just because I have small hands and can reach down into the engine to pick up dropped tools, or unscrew something that he’s already broken loose.  When it came to the engine mounts though, the only thing I’m good for is holding the trouble light so he can see what he’s doing.  And, of course, documenting his amazing feats.

In trying to loosen the engine mount on the driver’s side, he had his socket extension not fully engaged with the socket, and tugged on it for all he’s worth.  After a couple of years of working out every day after work, that’s evidently quite a lot, as he managed to completely twist the end of a 3/8" socket extension.  On the left is what it looked like before, and on the right… well, we did have to go buy a new socket extension.  And a 1/2" extension, to prevent this from happening again.

The old engine is almost ready to come out… just a few more bolts.  Then we get to clean everything that we’re going to re-use (which isn’t much), and put the new one in.

This is not part of standard engineer training, BTW, but swapping out engines is apparently all in a day’s work for a farm boy (which is what he was, before deciding that engineering is far easier and usually more profitable).

I haven’t been completely useless, though; I did fix the window on the Explorer (it had jumped its track), and installed a new stereo and speakers in Alpha’s Prelude.  I even soldered all the wiring, so that I don’t have to go back and re-do it later.

I’d rather be at the pool, but once all of my driving children are mobile, I’ll have more leisure time.  Taxiing them around has already gotten old.

Letting Go

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Yesterday morning, I dropped Gamma off at the airport to catch a plane to Charlotte, then on to Munich, and finally to Hannover, Germany. From there, she took a train to the town of Stadthagen.

This afternoon, I found that the town has a webcam! Of course, they’re six hours ahead of us, so it’s the late at night there now (about suppertime). I have heard from Gamma via e-mail, so I know that she arrived safely this morning, and attended the end of the school day.

School in Germany follows a different calendar (more like year-round) and schedule (half-day) than we do. It will be interesting to hear Gamma’s take on "Gymnasium" (college-prep high school) as opposed to ours.

She’s promised to send pictures, which I will promptly post. Although Gamma is a quiet child, the house is noticeably emptier without her. And, I can’t read the text on the Stadthagen web page, since my translator is there, rather than here.

I was an exchange student for a summer myself at about her age, and I know that it will be a fantastic experience for her.

Shocking Pink

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Not sure what prompted this, but Alpha dyed her hair shocking pink today.

Half of it anyway — the underneath half.

But, what can I say? She’s an honors student who’s on track to graduate with two degrees in four years; she finished her last final on a Tuesday and went to work at Y-12 on Wednesday to earn enough to buy the new laptop she’s been coveting (yes, Joel, it’s a Mac). She’s leaving next Monday for a Summer-long research internship at UGA.

At least she hasn’t pierced anything… hair grows out, or can be dyed back to its original color.

Besides, if the ORNL Director can sport an earring, then surely this little computer science/math guru can get away with pink hair. I’d dearly love to be in the audience when she presents her research at the end of the summer, but somehow, I wouldn’t be surprised if she fits right in.

Wow — it seems like just yesterday that I handed her her high school diploma, but it’s been two years.

Time flies.

Wild Ideas

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5 x 8 = 40, and 4 x 10 = 40. Therefore, 5 x 8 = 4 x 10… except that five eight-hour days are more costly to operate than four ten-hour days.

The Y-12 National Security Complex implemented this schedule for salaried employees (hourly employees turned it down) a few years ago, in an effort to reduce operating costs while boosting productivity. A nice side effect is that employees save fuel, reducing their commute by 20%. The three-day weekends are pretty sweet, too. An article in the Tennessean this morning indicates that local governments and community colleges around the country are now exploring this possibility.

A few school systems nationwide have also made this transition, beginning in Southwestern states where the population density is low and students must travel great distances to school each day.

In Colorado, where state law has allowed the abbreviated week since 1980, more than a third of school districts have switched to a four-day schedule. The savings include transportation costs (reduced by 20%), utilities, and food service.

Custer School District in South Dakota has had a successful experience, while others have not.

The positives: cost savings (energy, food, fuel), improved attendance rates, longer periods of uninterrupted learning time
The negatives: long-day burnout, missing a day due to illness is a 20% greater learning loss

Note that I didn’t list child care as either a negative or a positive; for parents working a 5-day week, it does create a need. On the other hand, parents who work have often found (in the systems that have already switched) that it’s easier to find someone to keep their children for one whole day, than for a few hours after work every day.

Such a radical idea won’t work if it’s top-down, though. It would have to be something with broad parental support, and careful consideration of unintended consequences. But, it’s worth thinking and talking about.

Celebration

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Two graduated, two to go!

The shot’s a little fuzzy, but it captures the air of confidence, celebration, and enthusiasm of last Thursday night.  Beta is now a high school graduate, accepted at the university of her choice, planning to major in physics.

College will be a whole new experience for her, and likely one that she will embrace.  The concept of concentrating on what one is interested in, of being judged by mastery of material rather than quantity of homework completed, suits her just right.

This is the child about whom I received a concerned comment from a geometry teacher several years ago, notifying me that she had "a 104 test average, but a 14 homework average."  Her philosophy has always been to spend her time on what she doesn’t understand, while coasting through what she does.  Unfortunately, that doesn’t work so well where high school grades are concerned.

It does work well in most college classes.

I remember clearly how much the dynamics of our house changed two years ago, when Alpha left for college.  This Fall will also bring change, as there will only be two children at home, and only one without a driver’s license.  The younger two generally get along very well, so I foresee a bit calmer environment.

Beta has already selected a roommate, and despite the fact that they’re very different people, I think they’ve made an excellent choice. 

Congratulations, Beta… go get ’em, tiger!

The Alternative

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Oak Ridge has an alternative school, which for some years served the purpose of being sort of the last stop before reform school. If students are expelled (usually for zero-tolerance offenses), they are usually permitted to attend the alternative school rather than just drop out.

It still serves that purpose, but over the last few years, we’ve been moving toward making it truly an alternative — a place that also serves those students who, for whatever reason, just can’t function in the big, open environment at the high school. Beginning about a year ago, it also became home to our credit recovery program, whereby students who had failed classes necessary for graduation could make up those credits in an online format and still graduate on time.

The alternative school is housed in the old Daniel Arthur building on Emory Valley Road. The facility was built as a school, but is in poor condition at this point, and not an optimal design for this purpose. The section of the building that houses the alternative school has exterior doors to each classroom; the plumbing is unreliable, and the electrical system is maxed-out.

On the other hand, with completion of the high school renovations, we will have an entirely empty, reasonably new building adjacent to the high school campus within a few weeks. Designed as home to career and technical classes (what we used to call "vocational" until the term developed negative connotations), it’s a good facility. We no longer teach cosmetology or automotive repair at ORHS (now with health sciences, networking, CAD, and other subjects having taken their place), and the career-and-tech classrooms are integrated with the rest of the high school. As they should be.

After a lengthy discussion last night (an hour and a half?), we made the decision to move the alternative school to G Building, adjacent to the high school.

There are three pages of solid reasons for the move, and only one that gives pause: will the closer proximity to ORHS (adjacent, actually) create any danger of students assigned to the alternative school for disciplinary reasons, mixing with the general student body?

I believe that the answer is no. Roger Robinson, our alternative school principal, is a gifted educator with a calling to work with struggling and difficult students. Chuck Carringer, the ORHS principal, has proven himself at ORHS. Working together, I have absolutely no doubts that they will devise strategies to accomplish the necessary separation for those students who should be separate, while allowing access to both facilities for those who need it.

(continued.. a few hours later)

As I noted in the meeting yesterday, I’d had a couple of phone calls over the weekend after Bob Fowler’s article ran on Friday.  Both callers had concerns about "those kids" being too close to the high school.  This afternoon, I had an e-mail to the same effect (excerpt as follows):

It seems to me that the administration is attempting to make the Alternative School  more convenient and attractive for the Alternative School students.  However, the reality is that the Alternative School students have forfeited their rights when they took what ever action they took to get them placed into the alternative program in the first place.  It’s great to try to provided the same level of education and educational atmosphere that the rest of the school has.  However, that should not be done if there is the slightest concern for the rest of the students.

Seems fair enough, right?

First, what most people do not realize is that not all of the Alternative School students are there because of disciplinary reasons.  Of those who are, most are there because they did something stupid — showing up at a school event under the influence, even just skipping school too many times.  Some got caught with drugs.   Some got frustrated and told a teacher to "f— off." A few are there for violent offenses, and they are receiving strong guidance in areas like impulse control in addition to their three R’s.

Our students at ORHS, and society in general, will be safer if we do not abandon and fail these students.  Furthermore, the credit recovery programs based in the alternative school are of benefit to ORHS students, some of whom are not now able to access them because they don’t have transportation to the Daniel Arthur building during the school day.

I asked blunt questions last night, and I’m comfortable that my children (yes, my children attend ORHS) and yours will be not only safe, but safer, with the new arrangement.

Backward

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In preparation for increased math requirements in high school beginning in 2009-2010 (15 months from now), Metro Nashville Public Schools are dropping their 7th grade Algebra offering.

Julie Martin, the district’s math coordinator, said parents should embrace the new changes. She said two years of middle school preparation are necessary for the new, more rigorous Algebra I curriculum requirements that roll out for 2009-10 — far tougher coursework than what’s tested on the current Gateway end-of-course exam.

I’ve read and re-read the article, but the concept still doesn’t make sense to me. If the new Algebra I is going to be that much harder, perhaps they need to raise the standards required for admittance to the course in 7th grade, but to bar admittance entirely based on grade level seems foolish. Some kids are ready; some are not. However, keeping a student in a course that is too easy for their ability level fosters boredom and loss of interest, which is decidedly counterproductive.

Different people — even children — have different interests, aptitudes, and abilities. Any given child may possess extraordinary abilities in one subject, while remaining rather ordinary in others. Some are advanced in all areas, and others struggle with everything but gym. I’ve wondered for a long time what it might be like to have school based upon mastery alone, rather than our current system of age-based progression.

If we wish to raise the level of math competency in high school graduates — an entirely different conversation, but assume for the moment that we do wish to do this (because the state says we must) — would it not make more sense to allow those students who are ready for advanced material earlier, to do so?

Some thought needs to be given to the core principle of enabling each student to reach their full potential, in whatever discipline that might be. We all talk about it, but sometimes, it seems like we’re going in the other direction.

Postscript: Jackson Miller has an opinion on the subject.  Along with the City Paper.